A Lifetime, A Legacy: Marlene McHale
Sea Isle City’s McHale family lost a vibrant part of its heart when Marlene McHale passed away in early March. Local faith and civic communities lost a dedicated friend.
Mike McHale takes delight in talking about his late wife as he sits in the cozy living room of the home where the couple raised their four children and dished out tons of fun for their 11 grandchildren. Judi DiBabbo, one of the McHales’ children, joins her dad in describing her mom’s many kind ways. Both pause and go silent now and again as they gulp back tears.
Love begets love.
Marlene’s warmth fills the McHale home. Its family room overflows with her personal touches. Beautifully framed wedding portraits featuring three generations of family members fill an entire wall. Built-in bookshelves hold children’s books, games and more than 100 family photo albums, including individual albums that Marlene assembled for each grandchild. A realistic ceramic sandcastle, a sample of innumerable ceramic pieces Marlene handcrafted for family and friends over decades, rests high atop the bookshelves. This charming sandcastle served as one of the table centerpieces that Marlene created for her daughter Judi’s wedding.
Southwest Philadelphia native Mike McHale and South Philly native Marlene Scavuzzo met and fell in love 50 years ago. They were married for 48 years. During the decade she worked for the Insurance Company of North America, Marlene’s notable typing skills came in handy in helping to support her spouse through college at Penn State. The McHales moved to Sea Isle in 1976. Mike’s family had spent summers in Sea Isle after his parents purchased a home there in 1952, but “Marlene was the one who wanted to move here permanently,” Mike muses. “Sea Isle City is a beautiful town and Marlene loved this town.”
Interestingly, Mike, a retired teacher, went on to serve as Sea Isle City’s mayor, commissioner, councilman and more over time. “I couldn’t have done 90 percent of all that without Marlene,” he says.
Mike and Marlene joined others in founding the town’s Garden Club in the 1980s. They also performed in several of the Sea Isle Players’ theatrical productions.
Marlene worked as a local force for good in plenty of other realms.
As an active member of SIC’s St. Joseph Church community, Marlene served in countless ways over the years. In addition to being a Eucharistic minister who distributes Holy Communion during services, Marlene applied her organization skills to arrange for the annual May Procession, the annual Blessing of the Sea on Aug. 15 and outdoor living Rosary gatherings. Furthermore, Marlene was the force behind many a parish trip to shrines like The Miraculous Medal Shrine in Philadelphia and the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Washington among other sites.
Marlene also served as president of St. Joseph Church’s Marian Guild, a prayerful group that was also highly effective in raising revenue via a gift shop it once operated behind the church. Proceeds supported local people with needs, including tuition assistance for their children to attend St. Joseph School. Marlene put her widely recognized Italian cooking skills to good use by baking traditional Easter lamb cakes for the Catholic Daughters of America’s annual bake sale fundraiser, goodies that sold quickly, Mike says.
“I was blessed to have her as a friend,” says Regina McKinley, who first met Marlene through church and the Marian Guild. When each of them ran small babysitting businesses in their homes – a business that Marlene started so that she could keep an eye on her mother, who had dementia – they often talked on the phone.
“Marlene had the gift of gab!” McKinley says with a laugh. “Marlene was one in a million and a great role model for me. Marlene and Mike were what you would want every couple to be.” Both then and now, “Marlene shines through her children,” McKinley adds.
Betty Pearce, another Marian Guild pal, met Marlene through their children who attended St. Joseph School in the 1980s. Pearce’s son was a member of the Cub Scout troop led by Marlene. “Marlene went out of her way in providing creative things for the boys to do” during their after-school Cub Scout meetings, Pearce says. “Plus, she fed them well!”
They were among a number of women who moved to Sea Isle in the late 1970s, none of whom had family in the area, Pearce recalls. So, they bonded and formed a spiritual book club. “We met once a month [in the church hall], but we never got to the books.” They were too busy gabbing about family and other matters, Pearce says with a hearty chuckle. “It was all in good faith!” These women grew so close that they dubbed themselves the “Soul Sisters” and continued to meet monthly for more than 20 years.
Mike and Marlene were part of another band of longtime friends, “The Soup Group,” which first formed in the 1970s under similar circumstances. John and Ronnie Newman and the McHales moved to Sea Isle around the same time. “The Soup Group” gathered regularly for meals, starring homemade soup always cooked by the men, for more than 30 years.
Both John and Ronnie Newman note Marlene’s tremendous courage as she faced the disease, ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease) that led to her death. “Marlene kept her faith in God and her love, faith and trust in Mike and her family” throughout her illness, John Newman says. “Marlene accepted each new trial with grace and strength; Mike took each day as it came.”
When they moved to Sea Isle, “Marlene was the first person to welcome me,” Ronnie Newman says of her “true Italian grandmother” friend who celebrated every grandchild’s achievements and birthday and decorated for every holiday, including St. Patrick’s Day.
Welcoming, indeed!
“In her home, everyone was welcomed at the dinner table and there was an extra bed or couch for anyone to stay,” Michael McHale said in his eulogy for his mother. “Whether it was a visiting priest or nun, grandparent, aunt, uncle, cousin, or group of five friends…”
By all accounts, the McHales especially relished having their home filled with their children and grandchildren. Thanksgiving weekend at Grammy’s and Poppy’s became an annual whirlwind of overnight fun that included: Friday afternoon at the movies and witnessing Santa’s arrival and the Sea Isle City tree lighting that night, a Saturday visit to The Wetlands Institute in Stone Harbor followed by “Grammy’s Tea,” a by-invitation event with sweet treats and gifts of an ornament, matching pajamas and a book for each child, and chocolate chip pancake breakfasts.
Plus, the McHales celebrated grandparenting by babysitting at their grandchildren’s homes at least once a week. When jumping in the spray of a backyard hose lost its luster for the children, Marlene and Mike established “Grammy and Poppy Adventures.” These adventures introduced their grandchildren to: the Garden State Discovery Museum, Adventure Aquarium and Duffield’s Farm in New Jersey; the Please Touch Museum, the Franklin Institute and the Academy of Natural Sciences in Philadelphia; Valley Forge and Lancaster, Pa., and more. Grammy and Poppy purchased a van to accommodate everyone during their excursions.
Even in her final months confined to a wheelchair, Marlene attended Sunday Mass and her grandchildren’s events, like wrestling matches, swimming meets, soccer games and a Christmastime Nativity play, Mike and daughter Judi say. “Mom was a trouper,” Judi adds.
“Grammy is a role model for me for positivity,” says the oldest of the McHale grandchildren, Ava DiBabbo. “With all her challenges, Grammy still had a smile on her face.”
